Do’s and don’ts while in uniform

by Whitney Bailey

The military service etiquette we abide by today is steeped in several hundred years of U.S. history.  Many rules change over time as the military updates codes of conduct to reflect new attitudes and etiquette.  However, some traditions still exist that may seem a bit antiquated (or even unfair) to you, the spouse.

When reviewing the list below, keep in mind that maintenance of these rules allows service members to project professionalism.  These rules apply to your service member anytime he is in uniform, but many also apply to you when you are you attending a military function or in public with your uniformed hubby.

Do:

Walk on your husband’s left side so he can salute others.

Refer to your spouse by his first name or nickname, or as “my husband.”  Do not refer to your husband as “Capt. Smith” or “the Captain.”

Stand at a public function or ceremony when the senior officer enters and is announced.   This applies to everyone in attendance.

Offer your husband an umbrella in the rain, but only if it’s black. He’s not allowed to carry any other color.

Push the baby carriage or stroller so your spouse doesn’t have to.  It’s considered “unmilitary” to do so while in uniform.

Help your spouse carry any packages or bundles to make it easier for him to salute.  (Are you wondering if a man made up these rules so that wives would have to do all the heavy lifting?)

Don’t:

Show public displays of affection, except at homecomings and goodbyes.  This includes kissing and holding hands.

Offer your spouse a piece of gum.  It is not “military” for him to chew it.  The same goes for smoking while in uniform.

Allow him to put his hands in his pockets unless he is placing or retrieving an item.

Refer to your husband’s orders as “our orders” unless you are a service member yourself.

Offer him food or drink while he’s walking.  He should not be eating, drinking or using a cell phone while walking in uniform.

Refer to others in the service as “sir” or “ma’am,” even if your spouse does.  Refer to them by their rank and last name (“Capt. Smith”).

Allow your child to wear your spouse’s uniform for Halloween.  Uniforms bearing insignia, badges and tabs should be worn only by authorized personnel.