‘Suddenly military’ kids test schools
Help educate teachers, counselors about deployment
By Sara Horn
When Christie Pickard’s husband deployed last year, her family faced a familiar situation for those in the Guard and Reserve: they were the only ones in their area experiencing deployment.
Pickard, an Army Reserve wife, lives in the metro Atlanta area with her four children. At the elementary school where she teaches – and where her youngest daughter Michaela attends – there were no other children whose parents were even in the Reserve.
“Our guidance counselor talked to her a few times, but admitted to being ill-equipped to deal with this particular situation,” Pickard said.
Sixty percent of Guard and Reserve families live at least 25 miles away from the nearest military installation, says Dr. Mary Keller, president and CEO of the Military Child Education Coalition (MCEC), a nonprofit organization that helps serve the educational needs of military children.
“These Guard and Reserve spouses and children aren’t privy to the wealth of resources provided by the installations themselves as well as the nonprofits and corporations that have established services for military-connected children nearby,” Keller said.
To help people like Pickard, whose husband was cross-leveled and deployed with a unit from Florida, MCEC developed the Supporting Children of the National Guard and Reserve Institute (GRI). GRI programs are open to school teachers, counselors, administrators and personnel of the Guard and Reserve. The research-based training teaches participants to support “suddenly military” children through mobilization, deployment and transition.
LESSON: COMMUNICATE
Guard and Reserve parents can help educate their children’s school about the support offered through MCEC and other opportunities. Notifying teachers and guidance counselors before the deployment begins can help open lines of communication and alert them to scheduling conflicts due to departures, homecomings or R&R.
Glenda Robles, an Army Reserve wife from California, made it a point to let her children’s junior high and high school teachers know that their dad was coming home from training for five days before leaving for Iraq and they might not get all of their schoolwork done.
“They were super supportive and worked with them to help them have more time to make it up than they would normally have been given,” Robles said.
LESSON: AWARENESS
Pickard, whose husband returned in January, said what their school officially lacked in experience with deployment, they made up for with the love and support they showed. Pickard said many of her students would write her poems. Fellow teachers would collect letters and gifts to send to her husband in the weekly care packages she mailed to Iraq.
“Awareness is so important, especially at schools that are not used to having military children, much less ‘suddenly military’ children,” Pickard said. “Most of the time they want to do something, they just don’t know what to do.”
LESSON: LOOK FOR SIGNS
Linda Neault, who heads up the GRI program, said parents also should help schools become aware of what to look for in a child dealing with deployment. Signs of deployment stress can include the unwillingness to go to school, significant changes in grades or participation and a difficulty in concentrating.
“Children also exhibit strengths during deployments, such as maturity and patience, and it’s important to recognize those strengths as well,” Neault said.
Parents can check in with their child’s teacher periodically through an e-mail or a note and ask how their children are doing. The teacher should know the hectic nature of deployment may make “suddenly military” parents a little forgetful from time to time, but reaching out will encourage them to send updates on how things are going in the classroom.
LESSON: REACH OUT
Amy Maxwell is from Missouri and is a chaplaincy candidate in the Army Reserve. Her husband, Joel, is also a Reservist and deployed to Afghanistan the year their oldest child, Jeremiah, was in kindergarten. Though Amy says their city is not a military community, there were a few children in her son’s school all experiencing deployment.
The guidance counselor held a weekly support group for the kids. The children sent decorated pillow cases to their deployed parents and created posters of themselves and their parents that hung in the school hallways.
When Jeremiah had to stay with his grandparents for six weeks while Amy was in Army training, his class sent him letters.
“The extra attention and military small group really seemed to help Jeremiah,” Maxwell said. “He didn’t feel so alone. As a mom, just knowing that the school was trying meant a lot.”
GUARD AND RESERVE INSTUTUTE
The GRI creates a support network for geographically isolated families. Training for educators and counselors of all grade levels addresses issues such as “suddenly military,” the deployment cycle, separation from parents, possible moves and school transitions, emotional issues and economic changes. This month training will be offered:
Sept. 14-15
Best Western CottonTree Inn and Conference Center
North Salt Lake, Utah
Sept. 15-16
University Center of Lake Country
Grayslake, Ill.
Sept. 17-18
Weber School District Office
Ogden, Utah
Sept. 21-22
Ramada Stevens Point
Stevens Point, Wis.
Sept. 23-24
Holiday Inn Downtown
Lincoln, Neb.
Sept. 23-24
Region One Education Service Center
Edinburg, Texas
Sept. 29-30
Sandhills Convention Center
North Platte, Neb.
Learn more at www.militarychild.org.