One Man’s Trash, Another Wife’s Treasure

Sometimes the best deals on base aren’t at the Exchange…

By Mollie Gross 


Base Housing Shopping is a military wife’s favorite pastime. This has nothing to do with the commissary or a sale at the BX but I assure you, the bargains are bountiful.

BHS is when you cruise the neighborhood (preferably higher-ranking housing) and look for people throwing stuff out on trash day or when they PCS and then taking it home with you.

I learned the fine art of BHS from Michelle, my neighbor on base and partner in crime. Growing up a Marine brat and then marrying a Marine, Michelle was a second generation BHS expert.

I have no shame! I have often indulged in decorating my home with relics from Dumpster dives.

Performing at comedy shows, I’ve seen wives rolling their eyes when I describe stealing things from the Lieutenant Colonel’s yard. Come on! We’ve all done it. It’s a guilty pleasure that I just can’t resist.

The thrill is too strong to resist. I have no kids, yet I currently have a pack n’ play and high chair in my garage. Not to mention the computer desk, wicker chair and coffee table. We’ve never spent money on a grill — grills NEVER make the TMO.

Bottom line, you would be surprised to find out how much of an average military family’s home is decorated with treasures found on the curb.

When you move so often, you just do not get attached to “things.” My husband and I have always been hesitant to take certain pieces with us for fear of damages. And we never wanted to drop a ton of cash on furniture that will just get scratched or destroyed. We can just pick up a new piece in the next station (or when our next neighbors move).

If you’re going to actually do some BHS, a word to the wise: make sure the First Sergeant or Colonel’s couch you are eyeing is actually trash and not patio furniture. Make sure they are actually moving before you take stuff from their yard. It’s super-embarrassing when your hubby’s CO is over for a barbecue and comments that your patio chairs look just like a set they had stolen during their TMO. Not that I am speaking from experience….

Mollie Gross is a military wife humorist, spouse of a former Marine, author, standup comedienne and motivational speaker. To see her tour schedule, buy “Confessions of a Military Wife” or book her, please visit www.molliegross.com.