New Baby, New Challenges
Coping with a new addition.
by Rosemary O’Brien
Life always seems to be more challenging when your spouse is deployed. That is when the car decides to die and someone flushes a sock down the toilet. Add to this a brand new baby, and things can get really difficult.
“I tried to deal with every little challenge that came at me and to do special things to cheer me up,” said Tina Pugh, a Navy wife stationed in Portsmouth, Va., with her husband. Tina found herself with a 2-month-old and a 2-year-old while her husband was deployed for six months. She decided to spend the deployment back home with family in Washington state. It turned out to be a good idea since her new baby ended up experiencing several health problems during that time. Since he was born 2 ½ weeks early, she was concerned when he came down with RSV, then pneumonia. She and her other daughter got sick as well, so she ended up staying in Washington longer than planned.
“I was not able to go home and clean my house before hubby got home,” she grimaced, but she knew she could do whatever was necessary. “I had help from my mother, but with each new challenge, I started to realize how strong I was as a mother and a wife.”
Tanika Taliaferro, a Navy wife stationed in Groton, Conn., rang in the new year pregnant and due to deliver at the end of January. Her husband, Lt. Cmdr. Harlan Taliaferro, was sent for pre-deployment training two weeks before her due date.
“We had family help on alert for the delivery of the baby,” she said. “One person to drive me to the hospital and one to watch my daughter.” Tanika did not have to use the driver, however. Her husband had the good fortune of being allowed to come home before his deployment to Iraq. Their son waited until Daddy got home and was born two days later. “I was so grateful he was able to be here!” she said.
All wives do their best to keep occupied during the deployments. That is exactly the plan for Army wife Aundria Cooper Premo. Her husband, Spc. Dominick Premo, was deployed for almost 5 months when the calendar turned to 2008. With three children, one only 9 months old at the new year, Aundria knew she would be busy.
“I just try to keep myself occupied, playing with the kids, writing my husband, and hopefully talking to him over the phone,” she said.
Military wives have a lot of strength and creativity when it comes to surviving the inevitable bumps in the road without their spouses. A new baby adds a new way for spouses to find out what they are made of. Follow the example of these three women and know that you can handle anything that may be thrown in your path. Most of all, know that you are not alone.