Myths of Soldier-less Celebrations
Here or not, you can still celebrate with him (or her).
by Michelle Cuthrell
Matt and I have been married nearly five years and never spent an anniversary together; Matt’s missed two of his son’s three birthdays, and out of the eight years we’ve been together as a couple, we’ve only actually gotten to dress in matching red, white and blue outfits for those fabulous nighttime fireworks displays twice.
If your Johnny Soldier is missing yet another birthday, anniversary or family barbecue this fall, don’t worry, you’re not alone. The truth is, you can celebrate, even without your soldier present.
Myth No. 1: If my husband can’t be here to celebrate with me, there’s no point in celebrating; I should just skip the holiday all together.
Reality No. 1: We have to find new, creative and unconventional ways to celebrate these special occasions. Submit a video to CNN’s “Salute the Troops” (http://www.ireport.com/ir-topic-stories.jspa?topicId=1490) and send your husband a link to the blog. Take day trips with other Soldier-less spouses to destinations within an hour of your post. Explore that Podunk town and eat at that hole-in-the-wall restaurant. Viewing the largest male rodent and the biggest graham cracker in the world will mark a birthday to remember, even without hubby there. Make new traditions with these deployment friends.
Myth No. 2: If daddy is deployed, he can’t participate in the special event.
Reality No. 2: Try setting up a webcam date to sing “Happy Birthday.” Send birthday and anniversary packages both ways at least two weeks in advance and set a present opening party you can both enjoy over the webcam. Or, if your service member doesn’t have access to a webcam, send voice recordings for all his special holidays and ask him to send voice recordings in return for all of yours. He might not be able to be present in body, but he can still participate in meaningful ways that will make both of you feel close, even when you have to be so far away.
Myth No. 3: If the man of my dreams is in Mosul, I can’t honor him on his big day.
Reality No. 3: If you would normally treat your hubby to a birthday movie date and ice cream, buy that movie he’s been dying to see on DVD and send it with some astronaut ice cream. If you would normally surprise him with tickets to a favorite concert or gun show, buy the tickets anyway – for a date he’ll be back to attend with you. In place of a gift, send a CD of the band or a holster for his handgun in a flat rate box with a card announcing his date yet to come.